Why I do not Cover anymore
I spent 2 years covering my head full time, and just this past Summer the Lord released me from the religious bondage that I was in. I started covering one day during the summer months. I was walking around Walmart by myself when I notice what appeared to me a Hindu women in the store shopping as well. She was really one of the most beautiful ladies that I had ever seen. Fully covered from head to toe, only revealing her face, which was like an angel to me.
Little did I know that during my shopping experience that day, and looking at this lady as if she were Queen Ester. My husband was in the car reading the bible while waiting for me. Many times, he will pray and ask the Lord what he should read and study for that day. Well, he opened the bible that afternoon and Wouldn’t you know, that on that afternoon, he opened it up to 1 Corinthians 11.
Keep in mind, that I did not know what my husband was doing in the van at the time I was in the store. He shared this with me later on that evening.
OK, stay with me here…So as I was grocery shopping, it seemed like every isle I went on, this lovely beautiful lady was on. I wonder now, to myself, if she knew the impact she had on me that day.
I was shopping for over an hour, and evidently, while my husband was in the van in the parking lot reading 1 Corinthians 11, while keeping a look out for when I came out…This lady caught his eye too. She came out and my husband was also in awe with her. There was such a remarkable pure beauty that she released. I know that might sound odd to some, if you have never experienced it before. lol
So hubby saw her and continued reading 1 Corinthians 11. I still had no idea what he was doing, nor did he realize that I saw this lady too in the store.
Fast Forward to that evening:
I came out of the store and did not say anything about her. My husband also did not mention her to me at this time. Later in the evening when the kids went to bed. I got MY bible and opened it up. I generally always know what I am going to be studying and reading for the day, but that night I just opened it up on my lap in the living room. Lo and behold, it too fell too… 1 Corinthians 11 As I began to read it silently to myself, I asked my husband if he has ever studied 1 Corinthians 11. His jaw dropped, and that is when I then mentioned the lovely covered women in Walmart that caught my eye..He then told me everything that happened in the van earlier that day! AMAZING!!!
It was definitely a “God thing”
There are no restrictions placed on the Lord. He will use what ever means to teach his children something, at any given time too!!!
You see, during that season in my families life, we were very lonely. We complained to the Lord alot about how lonely we were. “As if he did not already know the details” We cried out to him!!
Looking back now, we clearly see the lesson that we had to learn. We were living in a place we hated, with people we did not like very much. It was cultural too, but I will not get into any of that in detail, because this post is about covering, and how the Lord uses everything around us, even our surroundings to bring Glory!!! It has nothing to do with us, but has everything to do with CHRIST! AMEN!
Back to 1 Corinthians 11….
My husband and I started discussing covering in depth, well into the night. We decided that perhaps I was to start covering. That this was what the Lord wanted, and without a shadow of a doubt, he did want me to cover. Had I not, I would not be where I am today.
The next day I was back at Walmart, buying some head scarfs. I also bought some on ebay and got a pattern, and began to make them for myself, and even for my daughters. I also began to sell them on-line to other like minded ladies..
Something slowly began to change in me though. As I covered, I thought to myself… that the pants that I was still occasionally wearing were not at all complimenting or modest enough to match my covering. So I got rid of them. I then would look in the mirror and see that my hoop earrings looked rather silly with my cover, so took them off too. Then came my expensive gold necklace that hubby got me years ago, with my name on it. SO I took that off… Then one day while looking in the mirror, I saw my glossy lips and eyeliner and thought that I looked more like a gypsy then a christian, given I now was covering, so away went all “my trimmings”, sort of speak.
I then took it even farther. The dresses and skirts that I was wearing were not quiet complimenting to my new plain covers, or even my face, so I reimaged myself 100%. For the first time in my life, I became a plain Jane!
I became a person that I hated! Yes, strong words!! And it makes my spine tingle just reminesing about it now.
I began to feel guilty having any fun too. Even scrapbooking, which was my passionate hobby, seemed not holy enough to partake in. I began to critisize others for doing, acting,and dressing the way I use too…I figured, if I was going to be misrable, then everyone else had to be too. Misery loves company after all, and Saten used this time to bring me to my lowest.
Let me just say though, The Lord had a different plan for me! He wanted me to only depend on him, soley on HIM! To teach me that.. as my flesh felt soooooo alone, I reallly was never alone at all. He was right along side of me the whole time, holding my hand. Trust me, I did not see it like that though. I really felt abandoned.
There is so much more I could say, but want to keep this testimony on tract. To sum it up, I became a modern day Pharisee.
One day while in my living room, I told my dear sweet husband to leave me be, so I could continue praying in peace for the rapture to come, cause there was no way that I wanted to live in this sinful discusting world any longer! I felt dirty being around so many UN-holy people, while out and about. I felt so much better then anyone else.
I would go out and while walking about, I would have people stop me in the stores and ask what religion I was, and what church I went too, etc. I also had people move out of my way, as if I was a Queen!!! I would have some people call me sister too, I guess they thought I was a nun??? *grin*
To sum this up…..
The Lord has us each in different places for certain seasons and periods.
To all the covering ladies out there who stumble across my testimony here…You may have people come to you frequently, and ask you what religion you are etc. You may start to enjoy the extra attention that your covering brings you, because Covering ladies do get lots of attention. As stated above. I was constantly asked at Walmart each week if I were a Mennonite, Mormon etc. Folks would even let me cut in front of them in line!! People seemed nicer and more friendlier to me, well at least the non-christians were. A few would take a tract from me, or let me share a few words with them. That was the jist of it though.
Everyone at our IFB church shunned us, all due to my cover. I even had a lady who confided to me that she use to cover. She pulled me aside one morning in the nursery and whispered to me, that if I wanted to have any friends, then I would need to take that cloth off my head!
That she use to cover, and never had a lady friend say so much as boo to her at church. Now that she does not cover, she has many church friends. I thanked her kindly for her advice, but told her that I thought it was so very sad to let satan win. That the cover just infearates all the other ladies who do not want to submit to their husbands, AND to scripture! That I did not need “those” type of lady friends!!
It was not a very good testimony at all for me. Maybe with others it is different though. The only people that I seemed to attract genuinly, was other ladies that covered. This too me, was not benificial or edifing for Christ. Jesus came for the sick, not the healthy afterall.
Covering taught me that it was really ok to be alone. To not depend on anyone but the Lord. Friends will come and go, some family will come and go too, but the Lord will never leave you, nor forsake you. He will be there when you are at your highest, and he will most definetly be there when you are at your lowest. We NEED trials and tribulations to learn how to TRUST the Lord. When things are going care free and fancy free..we are not growing in Christ, we are merely exsisting in life!
I have so many stories that I could share about the time I spent covering. I could probably write a book, but want to just give just a couple stories regarding the time I spent covering.
This past year:
I was at a homeschool fellowship called, “Brite Lights” Everyone was very religious there, yet I still felt even MORE religious, and I probably was!
I was the only lady that covered, but did not feel judged by the other ladies. Afterall, I figured that it was only a matter of time before the Lord convicted all of them to get on the band wagon too! That said, my family had a man approach us and ask us to join his family for fellowship that weekend. We did not know who this man was, it was the first time that he and his daughter were at the meeting in fact.
At the time, it felt natural but as we got together with this other family, we saw lots of religion about. Rules and Routine were in full swing! We noticed that the ladies covered too, but not full time, just during prayer time.
I began to silently think that this was the real reason my family were invited to fellowship with this family. I thought that due to my cover, I was perhaps seen as “a good influence”. I even had a friend of this families Husband approach me and tell me in front of my husband how much he liked the fact that I covered all the time. It kind of validated what I was thinking and feeling about the whole thing.
I am still not 100% certain why we were chosen over all the other folks to fellowship with, but it really does not matter now adays I suppose, because I do not cover anymore, and we are good friends with this family now!! But, back then…It made me think, think very hard about peoples intentions. Like I said, only the Lord knows our hearts. ♥ ♥
We can not began to know other peoples hearts, only Christ knows. But, we can make people precieve us in a certain light, by the way we look unfoutunetly.
And remember, All things are permissable, but all things are NOT benificail. This is such a moving verse to me.
Being a “Christ Follower” has nothing to do with a bunch of dos and don’t, or rules of the law. It has to do with REAL relationships. And when we find that we are letting OUR RELIGION get in the way with having relationships with others,(Saved & UNsaved alike) then we are serving a false God. We are not serving Jesus, if we are letting our Religion condemn others. Or keep us from having relationships with others. True, we are not suppose to cast our pearls to the swine and let people take advantage of us. We were blessed with a voice, and we do have the right to stand up for ourselves if someone is clearly using us as a door mat. This is not what I am saying. I am talking about being in Religios Bondage. Satan wants us in Bondage so he can continue to whisper lies in our ears. God is not a God of confusion though, and negativity. If something is negative, it is NOT from the Lord. If something is joyful and edifing to our ears, it is from Christ!
Breaking it down even more so….If We are withholding our love from someone because it goes against “our religion”..then we are not serving the one true God! It is that simple. If God hates the same people that you do, then you are not serving the one true God. It us that simple!
While covering, I felt that other ladies were just too convicted to be around me. The 2 years that I spent covering, placed me on a pedestal in my mind. I felt like such a perfect, as perfect could be Christian. Culture plays a huge part too, while reading scripture, and when we overlook that, we are setting ourselves up to fall into plain old fashion Religion!
Relationships get placed on the back burner. And we become nothing more then a modern day Pharisees.
Where am I now? and Do I ever cover?
YES, sometimes, But it had NOTHING to do with Religious convictions. Having a head covering on my head, given that I use to wear one full time, is symbolic to me now. I find that I am a little less stressed, and not so grouchy when I have one on. Sometimes I get up and feel I want to have one on, just for the style, or fun of it. It still holds a bit of meaning to me. It is personal, and I am not in Bondage over it anymore. I will not wear it, if I think it will make a person feel bad for not wearing one. It is really hard to explain.
Let me also say that it will be hard for you to stop wearing one if you have been wearing one for a long period of time. It is like a lady who wears dress’s and then converts back to slacks. If you are finding that you want to stop covering, you may have to transition yourself by wearing a headband for a while. Start with a thick one, and go to a thinner one, until you feel comfortable enough to not have anything in your hair. This is what I had to do. It really is something very hard to explain, unless you have been through it yourself. Or so the saying goes….
That all shared….
I know most of my readers are KJV only, and I prefer the KJV for my private devotions too, but let me share from the Message Bible today. Yes, THE MESSAGE BIBLE!!! Romans 14 It will blow that covering right off your self rightous head!! I didn’t just say that!!! *Grin*~~~~~xo~~~~~~
Romans 14 (The Message)
Cultivating Good Relationships
1 Welcome with open arms fellow believers who don’t see things the way you do. And don’t jump all over them every time they do or say something you don’t agree with—even when it seems that they are strong on opinions but weak in the faith department. Remember, they have their own history to deal with. Treat them gently.
13-14 Forget about deciding what’s right for each other. Here’s what you need to be concerned about: that you don’t get in the way of someone else, making life more difficult than it already is. I’m convinced—Jesus convinced me!—that everything as it is in itself is holy. We, of course, by the way we treat it or talk about it, can contaminate it.
19 So let’s agree to use all our energy in getting along with each other. Help others with encouraging words; don’t drag them down by finding fault.
22-23 Cultivate your own relationship with God, but don’t impose it on others. You’re fortunate if your behavior and your belief are coherent. But if you’re not sure, if you notice that you are acting in ways inconsistent with what you believe—some days trying to impose your opinions on others, other days just trying to please them—then you know that you’re out of line. If the way you live isn’t consistent with what you believe, then it’s wrong.