~Keeping professional in your Business~Several years ago I remember a news story about a bakery not wanting to serve a homosexual couple a wedding cake.Then there was another story of a woman who would not issue a marriage license to a gay couple. At that time in my life I was torn with it, and to be honest; up until today, I still was.I didn’t grow up in a religious household, but in later life fell into the religious trap. And when I say trap, I’m not bashing religion by any means. What I am saying is that during the time when my circle of friends were very “Pharisee-like” so was I. I just read last week that you become like the five people you mostly talk with. 🤔I had a circle of thirty or so people who were very strict and religious. They liked to refer to one another as accountability partners. Not friends! So I went from spending the first part of my life being very worldly. And then I spent the second part of my life as very judgy, to now, finding a healthy balance with people. Including myself. Fifteen years ago I was at a church where a eighty year old woman told me to never forget to… “Love them anyways.” We are called to show love. Not choose WHO deserves our love. Because we ALL do. We need to be genuine on showing this love.I had only been saved five or so years during the time this church lady shared. What she called, her LIFE MOTTO, so at the time I didn’t know what she meant, exactly. Having went the complete opposite direction for a period, I felt horrible inside. That said,I felt somehow, that God loved me a bit more then everyone else because I isolated myself against any Ungodly people. I did not understand why I felt so awful when I was earning Gods favor in the only way that I knew how. I started thinking very, for lack of better wording.. Amish. Old school Amish! To give a picture of my mind at the time..It was a very lonely journey. Romans 3:10 says:As it is written, There is none righteous, no, not one. I’m not sure why I felt better then anyone else, but I suppose that is what religion can do to you.During that period of my life I met another woman who seemed to be the complete opposite of me. She loved everyone! She extended so much love to everyone and everything, that it use to make me upset inside.Yes, Upset?! 😳She would tell me that Jesus loved everyone equally. Love the sinner, hate the sin. We are all pretty familiar with that phrase.Yet at the time, I didn’t really know how that fit into my life with God. What I do know now, is that hate and discord only multiplies. And it causes so much division in this world. 😔I’m realizing that I CAN love everyone and not change the world one bit. But I CAN have everyone who crosses my path leave me a bit happier then what they were, before we crossed paths. So while it’s impossible for one person to change the worlds ways…I can make a small difference.Whether a smile or hello, or even a ten minute conversation with a stranger who is going through a hard time, and needing someone to vent to, or hear his/her story…Or like today, a transgender person.Last week I had a man reach out to me and ask for help. He told me he was currently transitioning into becoming a woman, and liked a lot of the things I was reselling online. He wanted to know if he sent me his new measurements, would I help him shop my store. My first initial thought was no, this makes me uncomfortable. So I just ignored the request. After all, I’m a Christian, and I feel like men should remain men, and women should remain women. And while I do truly believe this, it should not affect me helping someone who is asking for my help. Currently we have a Chaplain in our Sunday school class that says when he is working at the hospital he will pray and bring bibles to everyone who asks. Fine. But this also includes Muslim patients who are ill and ask him for their holy book, the Koran. On occasion, he gets asked why he brings the Koran to the Muslims. And he reply’s that here in America, we have Freedom of Religion. And had he been ill in another country, and at the mercy of the hospital staff and asked for the Bible, he would like to have it brought to him. Most likely it would not be given to him per request, but here in America we have Religious Freedom, and he would never let his personal/religious views reflect his Job and professionalism. He has also shared that he’s had Muslims at the hospital ask him about Jesus, due to his genuine love he’s extended to them. Getting back to my recent encounter…It took this Transgender man three to times reaching out to me. And it shouldn’t have. I’m currently disappointed in myself. So tonight I extended Love regardless. I remained professional and helped clothe this transsexual man. I explained to him how ladies sizing runs, and told him about different fabrics. He seemed very grateful, and told me that he’s not use to women being so helpful and nice. And placed an order with me. It was really all very simple. 🙂If anyone has a similar story, please feel free to share. I’m going to be replying back to all comments next week, as time allows.
Be warned. This is something I’ve been adding to for the past month, and will be jumping all over the place. But….🙃
~Today’s Youth & Lifestyles~
Why do today’s youth frown at having a service job? Aka’ flipping burgers; sort of speak.
Didn’t all the us that grew up in the 80’s want to work so damn bad, that whether it was in a fast food joint, or cleaning up animal messes, if we got a pay check, we were all in!
Could it be because we were use to doing without?
People always question why? Why don’t kids want to start at the bottom?
I fall into this category too.
Most fast food places that I go to are basically run by the 40+. I always am confused by this.
Oftentimes I think it’s because more kids are in college full time until they reach thirty. Many remain at home and don’t work at all. I think I have found a couple puzzle pieces to this. Of course I could be wrong.
But….back in the days when we started removing both parents from the home, more often then not, out of necessity. I realize this.
By having both parents working, and hourly wage improving, parents had more money then their grandparents. More money coming into the home,eventually meant more vacations, toys, etc.There came a point, and I think it really took off in the early 90’s… where parents started providing more for their kids. Whether this was out of guilt, for not being around after school for them, or tucking them in at night…
Regardless, the more kids received, set the stage for MORE! MORE! MORE!
Always wanting more.
They saw their parents not saving for anything anymore, simply charging it.
Long gone are the days where people do without, use cash, save for all major purchases, and go on only a few vacations each decade.I will be the first to raise my hand here.
My mother was a single mom, but had several credit cards. When I wanted something, like new red Reebok High-Tops, because all my friends had the latest and greatest, she would get them for me. I can’t recall a time that I really wanted something that I did not get. Of course at the time, I didn’t realize how much damage it was doing to me. Or, that it would be thrown in my face for the next forty years.
But that’s besides the point.
My kids started off getting an allowance, but the more money that came into my household, did not mean a larger allowance. No, it meant no allowance, and I would just buy it.
Or charge it.
Before my family made a major move, more then a decade ago, we were swimming in maxed out charge cards.
We both became a part of the problem, which is why I don’t mind talking bluntly about this now. We have never been upper middle class, but I do consider us middle class.
However, there was a time when we were living paycheck to paycheck. I think this is the major reason people decide to get credit cards. After we sold our first house, we paid off all our credit cards and cut them up.
It was liberating!
We lived within our means for around five years. Then we started feeling bad for not being able to give to our kids what their peers had. So.. the cycle began again.
But by this time, along with a couple credit cards, I started working full time. Let’s be honest, even adults enjoy new things and instant gratification every so often.And while I have always been perfectly happy with ‘new to me’ things, I do like my lattes and avocado toasts as much as today’s youth.
I also like having a new cell phone every couple years. Keeping in mind- that all my work is through my phone.
And if I didn’t have a phone, I would not be working. That says something about myself. Something rather ugly, but we won’t get into that today.
In a nutshell, I’m all about convenience. I spent many years doing things the hard way. Now I want to do everything in half the time.
Much like today’s youth.😐
I don’t like gardening, yet enjoy organic foods. I have medical issues like everyone else, so during times of not feeling my best, I like to treat myself.
Again, ‘new to me’ but none the less.
We use to take yearly vacations, now that has increased to about 2-3 a year. Nothing fancy, but again, none the less.. a weekend trip here and there still counts. I think all these little things turn into bigger things over time. And while I have never felt that I had a ‘lifestyle’ to uphold, when comparing my families life to my neighbors, I’d be lying to think otherwise.
I’m thinking of how all the little things that I’ve grown accustomed to having, are the beginning of a lifestyle. We use to bring thermos of coffees and ice waters. Then I switched to buying a case of bottled water, and having it in the trunk for the kids to have whenever they get thirsty. Then my husband and I would treat ourselves to convenient store coffees.
After All, what’s a .89 coffee. 7-11 was our favorite because they were the first to offer free coffee syrups.That transitioned into Sheetz coffees for $2ea, and then to Dunkin Donuts coffees for $3ea, and now to $5 Starbucks lattes. Which I secretly hate, but my husband still adores. I use to pack lunch bags and coolers for trips to the city, zoo, hike, etc. But now we just go out to eat if we are out and get hungry. It started off with three Little Ceasers pizzas for only $5 each. To feed a family of seven for $15, is almost unheard of.
So why not?! But then we switched over to stuffed crust ones at $8 each. Feeding a family of seven for $24. Doable!
When we first started going out to eat more regularly, we would all order things to share and only order water to drink. For the seven of us, this kept the bill at around $40-$50 before tip. But now it’s almost double! With tip, it is!
Everyone gets a drink, and most of the time we all have our own platters. And yes, leftovers.
I remember a few years ago being out with my mother at the grocery store and reaching for a Diet Coke at the check out. She commented to me, asking me why I was going to spend $1.39 for a drink, when we were ten minutes away from her house.I told her because I was thirsty now, and why not?! What’s $1.39. She rolled her eyes and told me that I could buy a two liter Diet Coke for that price, and she could not justify it, and couldn’t believe I was. I then asked her if she was thirsty, and told her that I’d buy one for her too. She said that she was fine to wait ten minutes. And then got angry with me.
Last year I was out with my mother again and my teen daughter wanted a fancy frozen coffee. I asked my mother if she could pull through a Starbucks to get some coffees. She responded the same way as before, asking me why she couldn’t wait ten or fifteen minutes and make coffee at home.
My reply again…Why? We are out already.
So you see, I get it! And I realize that I’m part to blame. While I don’t fall into the mind frame of needing everything to be brand spanking new, I do enjoy the little things in life.
This reminds me of a family that we use to know years ago. They were considered upper middle class. Which I’m told, means six figures.
I guess in today’s world, Rich, means you are bringing in a seven figure income.
Six figures means upper middle class.
Anyhoo, I was over this families house one day, and she told me that her husband just got laid off. Her main state of sadness, was that she was going to have to cut back, and not be able to buy her fancy coffee beans.
At that time in my life I was secretly rolling my eyes thinking… Ohhh poor you!
I was making Maxwell House and Folgers coffee at the time.
Later, I started buying those same coffee beans! 😐
But tying this story into ‘lifestyle’ and having the simple things in life..
She was really stressed out by the thought of not being able to buy the type of coffee she was accustomed to having.
THIS was something that mattered to her.
Later she opened a Go Fund me type of page and got enough funds donated, to buy their coffee beans. And she later mentioned that some neighbors blessed her family with a case of, said coffee beans.
And again, at that time… I thought this all sounded absurd to me.
Probably a lot like how my mother saw me buying a drink and coffee out, and not wanting to wait ten minutes until I got home.
This was years ago, but it has taken this long for me to realize that we all have little things that we find important. Things that we would miss if our ‘lifestyles’ changed.
This brings me to the conclusion that we ALL have lifestyles. Whether it’s buying a cheaper wine when times are tough..
Making your coffees at home with cheaper ground coffee..
Using milk instead of cream..(my husband would rather go without coffee if we have no cream in the house. This is his simple luxury)
Not having bottled water on hand and having to drink tap..
Having to get regular, instead of premium gas..
Having to paint your own nails and do your own hair, instead of salon visits..
The list is endless.
We all have little things that we will continue to roll our eyes on, when hearing…
But these little things are our lifestyles.
They mean something to us..
And today’s Youth have a lot more in common with us then we think.
That is very hard to think about. But maybe our grandparents went through the same. I don’t know.
Back in my day, I was making $5.25 a hour and was able to afford a $325 a month rent, buy my food, and afford public transportation. So I really don’t get how minimum wage is double here, and kids feel as though they can’t afford a $600 rent and remain at home.Then again… that would mean cutting out Fancy Lattes, Drinking strictly Almond Milk, having new phones, and yes, daily Avocado toast.
And I would not even omit any of that myself. 😁
So tell me about your lifestyle.
What is something that you would rather not do without.
Would you open a Go Fund Me page for it? 🤔