Complaining

I have officially grown up. Or have I?

I hate complaining! On either end.

Or, maybe it’s because I don’t have any negative people in my life anymore. 

I grew up with a parent that complained none-stop. I hated it then, but still managed to become an adult and copycat what I knew. I was an avid, daily complainer for years.

 

I then managed to surround myself with friends and family members who loved to complain. Or maybe they didn’t love it, but it was just a part of who they were. 

When I realized this, I started immediately praying about it and came to the conclusion, that for me, and my sanity, I simply could not be around people who complained non-stop.

I realize in this life you will complain sometimes, but it really should not be a daily thing. Negativity breeds negatively.

This brings me to last night.

I complained. A whole lot.

Today I’m questioning whether it was beneficial or not. Probably not.

I can see if you are out to dinner and receive  the wrong order, etc. Then yes, by all means, complain. Bring it to the servers attention.

But this was not the case last night.

My son mentioned to me that someone took his Easter eggs that were filled with candy and money. The church had a egg hunt.

Then earlier in the day one of my daughters was mentioning how some of her friends parents are very racist. She told me a few stories.

Another daughter mentioned that they no longer have prayer requests in her youth group. After I reminded her to add a friend to their prayer list.

So by the time we all got into the car and my son seemed disappointed, while telling me about the missing eggs, I just had enough.

I had been wanting to ask one of the youth leaders (There are four)  if they needed any food donations for the kids anyways. So why not tackle it all.

I went back into the church and found one of the youth leaders and just complained to her. I started with the stolen eggs.

Not that it was a huge deal, but more of a…. Why can’t these kids being watched more carefully. I didn’t say that. But I admit, I was thinking it.

Several months ago my youngest mentioned that it was hard to concentrate on the Bible lessons, due to some of the kids swearing Around her.

I had asked another daughter about it, and she said that pretty much, everyone swears there. The kids I mean.

Kids are cussing at church.

Why has this never been addressed?

I get it, no one likes a tattletale. But I don’t want it around my kids if I can help it. And I was the teacher, I would be saying something to their parents.

So the last time I complained to a youth leader was about the swearing. (Same leader as last night)

I realize, like school teachers, they are limited in what they can say. But why not have lessons about using words that glorify the Lord?! Isn’t there anyway that this can be addressed. I know kids swear, but I’m it not be at church?

Likewise, give lessons about theft and racism.

Getting back to last night, it was late and my words were all over the place. Per usual.

I know the leader wanted to get home herself, and probably did not appreciate me holding her up with a complaint, no less.

I asked her about the stolen eggs, and I think it  came out, more so, as….my kid has no treats now. Which was not my issue at all. She mentioned several times that she’d replace his loss, And she really didn’t think they were taken on purpose.

After that I mentioned about the racism. I mentioned that maybe there should be some lessons on theft and racism, seeing as these kids are our future.

That was taken the wrong way and she thought I was saying that my sons eggs were taken because he was white and is the minority.

Which also is not the case. 😔

It was a mess, and I’m feeling  just awful today, Thinking back on the conversation that was not thought out, on my behalf.

To make it worst, I left without even asking about the donations that I wanted to give.

I texted her after we arrived home  and have not heard back. So here it is, noon the next day and I feel like I me off as the type of person that I try to stay away from.

Had I chosen my words more carefully and waited a few days.. Things nay have been different. I’m not sure what to do next.

Not husband would say… Nothing. Just don being it up again and make it awkward.

 

 

 

 

 

North vr’s South

I have written so many North, versus South, posts in my day, but it has been a while. 

I’ve noticed another difference, so wanted to share. 

Vacations:

Growing up in North, when we took a vacation, we were always allowed to invite a friend with us. After all, The more the merrier! 

Likewise, when my friends would take their family vacations, I was always invited to go. 

Didn’t matter where, aquarium, zoo, circus, across the state, or to a different state. 

Even to Canada! My mon didn’t allow me to go to Canada though. 

Since spending the last 10+ years down South, this is just hot the case.

I have never thought about it until today, when one of my daughters asked me why she is never invited on her friend’s vacation, while we always allow the our kids to invite a friend. 

I asked her to ask her friends. Not in a demanding way… Or making her friends feel weird. Just ask and stop wondering. 

She did, and her friend/s did not mind being asked at all she said. In fact, one told her that she always asks, but her parents say no. 

Just family on vacations. These families are from the South. 

I have another daughter, my youngest, who always gets invited by one family to go on their yearly family vacations. 

In fact, that daughter is at the beach right now, with her friend’s family, on their vacation. 

However, that family is not from the South. 

So in learning, it is not the kids, it’s their parents. 

Kids want to experience life and make memories with their friends. Even on vacations. 

But Southern parents have a rule, family only. 

I suppose this is why there are so many movies devoted to family vacations, where the kids are, in most cases, miserable. 

I’m actually not a fan of these sort of movies. I  that sometimes family vacations should just be that. Family. But why all the time? Especially if the kids would like to invite a pal. 

Personally, I still stand, the more the merrier!

Why not let our kids enjoy themselves and bring friends along too.