February 1, 2022

February 1,2022
I blinked and a whole month disappeared again. They say that as we age, and get older, time goes by much quicker.

Januarys word of month in review is SICKNESS.

Covid In particularly.
Hubby got it, three out of four kids caught it. And now today, as I’m documenting this, I have it.
The last time I caught Covid was on my birthday, two years ago in 2020. No one else in the house caught it but me back then. No, I didn’t isolate from the rest of the family. I don’t have a west wing to retreat too.

I wrote down all my symptoms a couple years back and did a day by day and this current Covid, seems to be treating me the same.
First a sore throat. Feels almost like strep, but not as bad, and only lasts for twenty four hours. Then a migraine to knock your socks off. That lasts for two days. Then fatigue and chills. Cough and runny/stuffy nose at the same time. Waking with my skeleton hurting, especially my head, face, and jaw. It just hurts, I’m not sure how to explain the feeling.
All in all, it feels like the flu. Not fun. And I feel of you have preexisting health issues, it will feel worse for you.

Doctors say to stay in bed for ten days and take NyQuil.
I guess they need to tell you something though.
Currently I’m on day four.

I’m actually taking an arsenal of supplements like I did the last time and it takes the edge off enough to go about my day and work. Night time on the other hand is pure death, and I’ve just accepted it. Flus, bolds, and even Covid will be much worse when the sun goes down and peak as you are trying to fall asleep.

Currently I am taking the following:

Zicam 3x a day.
One Lactoferrin and two Benedryl before bed, along with Two Tylenol.

2 Noni, 600mg of Monolauren, 20,000IU of Vitamin D each day, 400mg of Camu Camu (vitamin C) along with 30mg of Zinc during the say.
And lastly, two cloves of garlic twice a day.

If I had to only pic two of the above to take, it would be Zicam and Tylenol. As they both are pretty instant.

Aging

I am finally realizing that I am aging.

I still don’t feel old mentally in the grand scheme of things, but I am noticing I am aging. Mentally and physically.

Weight– It is definitely harder to lose weight at this age.

Not to mention that a medication that I’m on has a lovely side effect of weight gain.

I use to hear this from the older generation when I was a teen and never understood how taking a medicine could cause weight gain. Was it all sugar? I thought to myself back then.

When the doctor told me that the new medication she was going to put me on did have a side effect that many women notice, weight gain, I just thought to myself “sure doc, not me”

I figured I would have salads for two meals instead of one. (I silently thought while listening to her tell me that I should really lose some weight or my knees will continue to hurt, but also, not to be alarmed, but this new medication has a weight gain side effect)

Well-

I’ve gained 20lbs this past year and feel horrible over it. Yes quarantine with all the home cooked meals is partly to blame too.

I miss going to the gym so much.

It really helps. I just feel better at the gym. Everyone together with a likeminded focus.

I’m so unmotivated at home to work out. We use to have gym equipment years ago, but then we joined a gym and I sold it. When I’m home I see it as “home life” not working out. Not to mention my work place.

I feel like you can shed weight in your 20’s and 30’s with ease.

Eat what and when you want, walk a tad and don’t eat before bed and you just magically drop weight.

In your early 40’s you need to work out though.

You need to work out on actual Gym equipment to keep things tight and firm.

And as long as you are working out, you can still eating what you want for the most part.

Now after age 45, you can’t eat what you want or not exercise. You also can’t properly digest things that you once could, such as raw foods. Nightshades! Oh my beloved nightshades.

Throw in some meds, and you are doomed unless you workout and starve yourself. It’s a lovely thought.🙄

I suppose you can diet and not workout if you have the willpower. I have done this off and on for years. I get bored eating the same things though.

My generation had parents that made you finish your plate and try all the foods..and not be picky.

Well thank you very much.

Now I love all the foods! I’m not picky at all. Except for Sauerkraut and Brussels Sprouts. AKA’ Mush and Eyeballs. 🤢

I was recently read that Jackie Kennedy ate one meal a day. A baked potato with caviar. And if she was really hungry a hard boiled egg with a side of cottage cheese.

Nothing else was ever swallowed the book said.

She had to have had the willpower of a saint to keep that perfect size 4 figure on her 5’7 frame. I bet her mom was the same way.

Many old time Hollywood actresses followed the chew and spit diet. Yes! Gross! (Now it’s considered an eating disorder, but back then it was a diet)

She also smoked two packs of cigarettes a day and cocktail hour was all day. Like Joan Crawford and many others.

Currently I’m only eating one main hot meal a day and having salads and hempseed Keifer shakes, while alternating oatmeal for brekkie each day. One omelette per month only. I do miss them.

It’s not fun and I’m miserable to be honest.

Nothing is more aggravating then depriving yourself, only to hop on the scale and see the same number. And sometimes 2lbs more, depending on the time of day, and the time of month it is.

I still drink coffee and tea. I’m trying to have just a tea bag in water with nothing else, and black coffee with stevia. Treating myself to Cappuccinos on the weekends. I was never a spirit drinker, except socially, but nowadays I have no friends that drink and have not had any Alcohol in two years. Nothing you want to be doing while on any medication, either. I do miss Champagne and may treat myself to some this coming New Years.

This is yet one more thing that I’ve become like my husband. He’s never been a drinker. In fact, his very first alcoholic beverage was with me back when we were dating and I took him to the Hard Rock Cafe on his birthday. I ordered us Long Island ice teas because he liked ice tea he had told me. I think the idea of sipping wine late at night on the front porch while watching the fireflies in the summer sounds romantic, but is it really? Lol

Getting back to food-

My alternating oatmeal’s are just made with hot tap water and no cream or milk to cut calories. I started this during quarantine and have not noticed that it helps in any way, but I’m use to preparing oatmeal this way now, so I will continue.

My medication is for Osteoporosis and Fibromyalgia, btw. Both run in my family as I’m sure many other families.

Once Covid calms down I want to get back to the gym. I honestly think it’s the only thing that works for the middle age weight gain thing. And brain fog, which I also feel sprung out of no where.

Today I’ve been working on jewelry inventory. I list several hundred pieces a week now and afterwards, sit down and assign each peace a letter.

This is today’s bin I’m working on. S.

I just realized after I finished assigning each piece the letter, that I typed the number 2 instead of the letter S in each listing. 🙄 What the what?

Am I suddenly becoming dyslexic too now?

I’m Closer to fifty then forty now.

It does not feel like I’m old. But I am! I’m Not mad or sad over it. In fact I’m very in touch with it and fine with it. I am simply noticing it for the first time though. In neon!

Eighty percent of my life is over I’d imagine.

Do I have another twenty years?

Only God knows.

My mom is in her early 70’s and my dad is early 80s. Both still like the energizer bunny. Of course they are! They are over stressed people who thrive on being busy and stressed. I’m not that person. Neither is my brother who spends his days at the beach when he’s not working and dreams of retiring at a camp ground, after living full time at one out in San Diego. He’s just as chill, if not more so, then I am.

Both of my parents told me years ago that having five kids will scale a decade off my life. And asked me why would I want that.

I really don’t mind if that’s a true statement though. In fact, had I started my marriage sooner in life I would have gladly had five more kids. I love my kids so much and they have never been an inconvenience or regret.

I’m not sure what I thought aging would feel like, as I’m a take it by day sort of person so am fine with what’s happening. I just didn’t see it coming. Lol They say you get crabby in old age. Not yet, but I have noticed that I really don’t like making plans or committing to anything anymore.

It’s just who I am now. I use to be a planner but have become more like my husband throughout the years, who hates planning. Gosh, we can’t even commit to a weekly dinner menu. Another thing that I’ve become more like him.👀

I use to be a strict meal planner, but many times my husband would come home and say that he didn’t feel like XYZ, and just make a sandwich or bowl of cereal.

Something else my older friends use to tell me back in the days is that Once you are married for over twenty years to the same person, one becomes more like the other. I have 110% become more like my husband.

Some of my friends even tell me that I remind them of THEIR husbands. Sometimes that is not a compliment! Most cases not. 🤪

Okay, moving along..

Now Let’s talk feet. I know, unless you have a foot fetish, we all hate feet. But… people have foot issues as they age. It’s a give-in. I don’t really know anyone who hasn’t. A few years ago during Sunday School prayer request there were four ladies asking for prayers for foot surgeries. Whether they had hammer toe issues, bunions, or ingrown toe issues… I remember thinking to myself… please no! I don’t want this to be a normal thing that happens to me.

Well, it has not. Knock on wood.

That said, I am having an issue. Perhaps not as bad as the above, but still an issue.

I can’t wear cheap shoes anymore. Meaning, faux leather. Or anything with a high heel .

I can only wear one brand in fact. Vionic!

I am open to trying other brands that are similar if anyone knows of any. I will not wear SAS though. I’m not ready for SAS.

I own seven pairs of Vionics. But am currently in the market for a Blk pair. What prompted me to buy pink, burgundy, mint green, and baby blue colored shoes- I still don’t know.

I still have another hafe dozen pairs of non Vionic shoes, but they are for two hours on my feet max. Otherwise, my feet simply hurt.

I need leather with arch support and toe box room. Why is this an age thing, I have no clue.

I should have saw this coming. My grandma and mother have always struggled with foot issues. As well as my older lady friends. I still recall the very first time in my life that a random lady (who later became my bestie) asked me how I kept my feet looking so good. This was back in 2003. I was watching my daughter in the church nursery and the lady next to me asked me about my feet. She specifically asked me how I kept my heels looking so smooth. Back then I had never had a proper pedicure in my life. It’s just that I was young! Still in my 20’s. Of course my feet looked nice. I told her I put rose oil on them before bed. Which I did! But I’m sure that was not it. It’s just because I was still young. I remember her slipping her shoe off and showing me her feet. They were dry and cracked. I was wearing slip flops.

Fast forward.. she was ten years older then me. We are in completely different churches and states now and still friends. Maybe I should text her a foot pic just for fun?! 😁

Nowadays, I treat myself to pedicures because I want my feet to look nice, despite how they feel at this age. I also still use rose oil on them, but not before bed because my sheets are more expensive now and I don’t want to ruin them.

What else?

Wrinkles! But not so much on my face. It’s my hands!

People still assume that I am my kids older sister when first meeting me. But I think it’s because I don’t dress my age. I’m not ready for big bold florals and polyester quite yet. 🙃

That said, I am starting to notice my aging hands more and more though. I know it’s part of life.

I look at them and wonder what happened? Why can I see my hand veins? I think the skin looks thinner. Where did it go? And the knuckle wrinkles are very prominent.

I know it sounds as though I’m beating myself up and am annoyed, but I’m simply stating the obvious on a observing level. I want to be able to look back and reread this five, ten years from now. 😆

On a more positive note, I have realized that I’m not a worrier anymore. In fact, I never worry about anything.

I also feel that my relationship with Jesus keeps increasing and everything is lined up for greater things. How awesome is that?!

I am more in touch with Gods ways, and how God allows things to happen to teach us and those around us certain things.

It’s a great sense of mental peace that I did not have even five years ago. As you mature and age, you really do get blessed with Wisdom and Peace.

So that is about it for my aging observations.

I feel like I’m living Gods will for my life which feels amazing.

Does anyone else notice any of these changes in themselves?

SYNVISC-ONE Did it Work?

After failed Cortisone shots last month, I decided to try gel shots. (SYNVISC-ONE) I was told that there is only a 50% chance that they will work. Not only that, but they will only last between 4-6 months. Out of pocket, for both knees, $1800. At first our very bad insurance, would not cover them. But my doctor said after they put it through 3x, they did. I don’t know how that works, but thank goodness it did.After insurance they cost me $880 out of pocket. Better, but still. The Cortisone shots were $480 out of pocket, and they didn’t work at all.

So let’s explain how this went. I went into the doctors office three Friday’s in a row. He hooked up the ultrasound to find exactly the right spot to inject, then numbed the area, then it was needle time. It felt like a sharp tube being pushed right above my knee cap. That is the best way to explain it. I still felt it going in, and yes it was painful, but I am ultra sensitive I pain, so maybe it’s different for others. I felt like I had no numbing cream though. I tried to place my mind on something cheerful. He was very professional and tried to keep me talking by asking me questions about my upcoming weekend.

In return I’d ask him questions, such as, I bet this part of your job is the worse for you. And I wonder if people who distribute shots all day, were once kids, who told their parents that when they grow up they want to be the person who gives shots and takes peoples blood all day. lol

Light hearted chat. Too my surprise, he told me that THAT was his favorite part of his job. And that he sees patients all day long that have what I was having done.

He corrected me when I called them shots.

He said he likes to think of them as procedures.

Procedure

After three injections, by the time week four arrives I am finished. He said that if they work I will start to feel better between a week to four weeks in. Today it has been a week. And yes, I am feeling some relief. If your knee pain is a solid ten, it’s now a solid three. Not painful, just slight discomfort today. I’m hoping by the end of next week it will start to feel even better. And so on.

I originally went to my primary doctor back in January this year for a random behind the knee pain that has just gotten worse since then. At first he told me to just stretch it and come back in a month if it still hurts. I bought some stretching bands and started using them. After a month of use I was back in with even more pain. Sure my knees hurt in the front, but that has been something I was just dealing with for the past two years. I had X-rays on them last year and the year before that and they told me I had mild arthritis in both knees, but that was somewhat normal at my age, along with being overweight. And in another 10-20 years, I would probably need knee replacement surgery. I think it’s interesting that they say everything is because you are overweight, as I know plenty of people with my same issues that are not an ounce overweight. Such as my mother. Some things are simply hereditary. Not to say that added weight does not worsen or strain pains.

Several women in my family have had complete knee and hip surgery done in there fifties and sixties, so I assume this is probably normal. At least for my genes. Also, my best friend had knee surgery done last year and has told me that she can run up and down stairs now, and feels twenty years old again. But the pain after the surgery was almost unbearable. Worse then anything she’s ever experienced. I felt the same way after my hysterectomy. Worse then any natural childbirth.

That said, I told the doctor last year, why wait.. let’s do this now while I’m still, sorta, young.

Needless to say, my insurance said nope! Too young.

Getting back to this year. In February I went to the doctor again about the pain behind my one knee.

He said that it could be a cyst, but that was an odd place to have one. So he sent me in for an ultrasound.

They found nothing. Or so I was told. But hey, I had the extra $468 bucks burning a hole in my pocket, so why not give it away for an ultrasound. *grin*

My primary doctor called me up and told me to keep stretching it. As they found nothing.

Three months passed and it was a more sharper, profound pain. It started waking me up in the middle of the night. I went in again and he sent me for X-rays . You know when you can tell that your doctor thinks it’s all in your head and doesn’t believe you? Well, that was the impression I was getting from him.

The X-rays showed bone on bone in my knees, one that was slightly worse then the other. So my doctor asked if I took up running in quarantine, and maybe I need to just rest and ice my knees. I told him of course I didn’t take up running, but I have been walking. Nothing major though. He told me t try to rest them for a month and he’s sure it will heal itself. He also prescribed me Diclofenac for pain.

A month later, pain was the same. The Diclofenac was helping other parts of discomfort throughout my body though. I went back in and he said there is nothing more he can do and sent me to a knee specialist. Again, it was as if he did not believe me. I went to the knee specialist and he did his own ultrasound and asked me if I was aware that I had a cyst behind my knee. He said that it is very small and would not be causing the pain I was describing at its size. He then asked if I took up running during quarantine. *bangs head*

He sent me for more X-rays and the following week told me that I have arthritis in my knees and should probably look to have future knee surgery.

He sent me to a surgeon for an evaluation.

The surgeon was the doctor who ended up giving me the knee shots. (Procedure)

On my first visit he ordered an MRI. He also told me to try o keep taking the Diclofenac for pain.

A month later I got the MRI results back and I was told to come back in to discuss options. Apparently, I had ripped my meniscus he told me. That that was what the MRI showed. It was probably not going to heal itself and it would require surgery to repair he said.

So. After all of those hoops that I went through, they told me that for insurance to cover some of the surgery I would need to go through the Cortisone shots and possibly Synvisc-one, first. Just to see if that relieves the discomfort.

I’m still confused. Discomfort from a tear/rip?

So while I originally went to the doctor for a behind the knee pain, they treated me for another pain.

Currently I’m still taking the Diclofenac, twice a day. I went a couple days without taking it, just to see how I felt and the all over body pain came right back. Honestly, you don’t know that you have certain pains In your body until they are removed. We are resilient! Daily mind over matter has its place.

I have struggled with all over arthritis for the past few years, but it was nothing that I felt could be fixed, seeing as I was/am getting older. The Diclofenac does nip that pain in the bud. My behind the knee pain however is currently still the same. 🙄

Oh! And during all of this I went in for my yearly checkup with my arthritis doctor and she told me that it was crazy that my primary doctor made me go through so much. When she would have just scheduled a procedure for my knees to sever the nerves. They also do that for back pain she said.

I have a friend who gets that procedure done, and it sounds most frightening. I’d honestly rather not have it done, but I do appreciate her belief that I do have pain and I’m not making it up or exaggerating.

I am suppose to go back to the knee doctor at the end of Next month to see how my knees are, and whether the behind the knee pain is still the same. He told me that of it is, then he will try to get me in for surgery on it.

Only time will tell…