Feeling loved by a parent 

Seems like such an easy thing to feel. Or is it too much to ask for?

Feeling loved by your parents.

I imagine the very first love a baby feels is from his or her mother. Or perhaps who ever baby first longenly gazes at.  I think feeling warm and comforted when a baby cries is the very first time a baby experiences love.

I like to imagine that is where and how a baby first experiences love. Of course I very well could be wrong. It’s just what I imagine.

Should we expect that same love that we  first felt from a parent or guardian as full grown adults?

My personal opinion, is YES!

Being a middle age woman myself, I’m just now realizing the truth about certain lives. Or perhaps ive always known, but am just now accepting this truth. 

Personal experience:

My mother raised me and gave me many materialistic things that all my classmates had growing up. She wasn’t affectionate. Rarely vulnerable, and rarely home. 

While I was at school she was home, and as soon as I got home she left till the wee hours of the morning. I still wonder why she didn’t work while I was at school to be home with me after school. But I guess she really wasn’t ever cut out to be a mother or parent. At least that is what her older sister has shared with me.

But I had all that I needed, and most of my wants. And as a child, that meant something to me.

Yet… I never felt as though she loved me.

I think it’s always been a voided sort of feeling. Looking back on my childhood as an adult now. I know she had/ has no idea how to love anyone. Perhaps not even herself. Sad really.

Being a full time mother myself, I clearly know what a parent/child love feels like. It’s deep, personal, and the greatest feeling ever imaginable. 

My mom did not have all that many men in her life, but when she did… they always, ALWAYS came first. 

She also has always played the victim card on being a single mother with two kids. And how awful that was for her. And she deserves happiness.

Now I can’t relate to that, but I do know that it’s not something you should spend 30+ years shoving down your kids throats. How awful it was. Yet there has rarely been any conversation that has not ended with that phrase.

 I also know that a loving parent should not always make their child feel bad over their childhood, etc. (the poor me syndrome) It’s terribly selfish. 
A parent should be encouraging and excited when their children do well for themselves and are happy. And don’t have to suffer as they had growing up. 

They should not always bring it all back to themselves and guilt trip their children time and time again. That is NOT LOVE. 

Well, this is what many children go through on the daily. I’m certainly no exception. 
I have spent my whole life wondering if something was wrong with me because I felt nothing towards my mother. Always having to fake it. 

I’ve spent years trying to force it. I do believe there was this one time that I cried because she was leaving. She was moving to another state, and I had two small children that were going to be growing up with no grandparent. Looking back now, I know it was more of an attachment thing. Not love. I look back now and know how miserable I would have been, had she not moved to another state.

I’ve spent years going down to visit her each year, but I’ve always come back stressed and agitated. I’ve felt it was my duty as her daughter. So I’ve always tried to cator to her.

But she’s all alone because of her selfishness. It’s always been all about her and what she feels entitled too. And it always ends up with the phrase… “because of all I’ve had to sacrifice being a single mother with two kids”

It has not been an easy decision, but I’ve finally realized that I do not own my mother anything. I do not need to force a relationship with her, in hopes for a couple bread crumbs of genuine love.

Moving right along… 

Yes, I have a father too. I didn’t actually grow up with him 24/7, because my mother had custody and we lived in different states. I did see him though. And he’s always been up front with why he always strayed, sort of speak. 

You see, my father is the polar opposite of my mother. Very affectionate and loving. Some may say, too affectionate. Borderline suffocating. But none the less, overbearingly loving. 

My father never gave me anything though. Well, except my life. But I’m talking about  needs and wants. No child support. 

Mother spent years telling me that he use to threaten her, that if she ever divorced him, then he wouldn’t pay a dime. And he kept that promise. Yes. Messed very up. I know! But then most things are.. such as this earthly life…

That shared.. I have never doubted his love for me. Go figure..

This has confused me this past month. I may write about it again in the future. It helps.

But for now, I do have some closure. 

My eyes have been open. 

Two months ago, I was still in denial. 

And no one can ever place a price tag on closure

I’m Done

I’m writing this to partially vent, and partially document my current feelings right now, along with material to reread in the future if I get weak….


This week has been part hell and part bliss.

The bliss was spent alone with my daughter, playing tourist with a private chauffeur (ubur)

Yes, I spent $80 in ubur fees this past week, but I don’t drive, and I’m pretty certain that renting a car for a week would have been more, or at least equal.
The hell part of the week was listening to someone complain and belittle me. And not realizing the damage she was doing. A friend told me to stay strong and turn the other cheek. But I just couldn’t keep feeling down right exhausted each time she would speak.

I tried to hold on, but just couldn’t. 
Some of the complaints were,
1. Looks like you put on some weight.

2. What the heck is wrong with you, it’s 90 degrees, how the hell can you be cold. 

3.Do you really need that?

4. Do you know how many calories is in that? A seed bar is all I need in the morning, and that lasts me till dinner, in which I have a salad or bowl of soup. That’s why I don’t ever gain weight.

5. I don’t understand why you like the beach. The sand fleas, sun, people.

6. You have no idea what you are talking about, just wait till you are my age, then we will talk.

7. You are lucky you have a husband. Try being a single mom with two kids and not a lick of help!

8. If you want hot coffee you can’t pour it and go use the bathroom.

9. I’m sorry the air mattress isn’t comfortable but it’s all I have. Try sleeping on one for four years like I had to do once.

10. I’m sure your bed back home is not any more comfortable that what I’m offering you.

11. I hope you don’t mind sleeping with the lights and tv on. Remember, you are a guest.

12. I’m doing more dishes in the past few days then I have had to in the past four years.

13. Don’t bother putting the groceries away, I need them a certain way.

14. It would be nice if I had some help here!

15. Let me show you how the shower curtain works.

16. The towel next to the sink is for you to dry your hands on, NOT the one hanging up. I realize they are the same towels, but it’s how I do things.

17. I don’t have any ants here I don’t know what you are talking about. You must be seeing things.

18. Make sure you scold the cats if they try to eat at the same time.  

19. If you go to the beach make sure you don’t bring anything back inside that was at the beach.

20. Why are you cleaning the seashells in the sink. Those should have been hosed off outside. They stink like the beach!

21.You don’t know what it’s like living on a fixed income, and hopefully will never have too.

22. It cost me $80 last month to get my hair done and now I need to get it done again because it’s fading.

23. You are not actually going to pay an extra dollar for that tomato, right? That’s insane and stupid! Just stupid!

24. So, does your household still eat whenever they want and however they want? Does everyone still eat differently and at different times? I don’t know how anyone can live that way. But I guess I’m old school and we grew up eating all at the same time and all are what was served!

25. Don’t forget to wipe any hair out of the shower and drain, and that goes for your daughter too.

26. Are you really going to let your daughter go outside at this time of night?

27. No, of course I don’t want any of that orange juice, I have diabetes, or have you forgotten? Now pass me one of those pepper mints.

28. If you are going to have a potato you might as well gorge on a cupcake. Your body sees it as one of the same.

29. You have no idea what REAL struggling is!

30. There’s never been a time when I was happy, I didn’t realize that you thought differently.

31. I’m not staying in FL. I’m going to find someone who will let me live with them for the summer in exchange for my company. 

32. I don’t drive in traffic or in the dark. Live with it!

33. I am at the mall to pick you up, but you will have to walk around to the front because I’ve never driven around the back and don’t plan to now. 

34.Why must you get a Starbucks coffee while we are out. That’s simply not needed!

35.Maybe you like the nonsense sitcoms that are on today, but I don’t. 

36. I don’t have the internet and have no desire to learn. Why would I want to waste my time and energy.

37. When I was your age I had tons of energy. Wait till you reach 60.

38. Some people have to work for a living!

39. Make sure you eat up that food that you bought or it’s going straight to the garbage.

40. It’s hard for me to feel sorry for anyone. Karma is a bitch, and what goes around comes around.

41. Just remember, you only have ONE mother and regardless of the circumstances, she deserves respect!

42. Today’s kids are still living at home at age 25, and it’s the parents fault for coddling them their whole lives! That, and they seem to feel entitled and scared of the real world. I certainly didn’t raise you that way.

It falls back to the parents, and letting their kids rule the home. I will never understand this screwed up generation. Is she the product of how you raised her?

43. I know you say you just like it, but I simply don’t need makeup to feel good about myself. I don’t! Apparently you do!

44. So tell me again why you feel the need to waste money on a hotel when you can stay here with me?

45. I’m not arguing just because I’m raising my voice. And I’m sorry if you and your daughter think I am. That’s on you, not me. Get over it! Welcome to the real world!

46. Well I’m happy that it works for you but at my age you want someone else to do it. Don’t you think I deserve at least that?

47. You are delusional and don’t know what you are talking about.

48. No. This is the first time I’m hearing this. You are lying if you think you have already told me this.

49. I don’t need a bunch of friends to fulfill me. I also don’t need church. I know my limits and who I am. 

50. You snore, did you know that? You really need to get that checked out.

51.People live in RV’s at my age, not yours! You guys are living in a fantasy world if you think you will be able to do that. But whatever!

52. We’ll tell me about this book. What’s it about and why do you think of like it? You know how picky I am about books. I doubt I will like it.

53. I can’t be around negative people. I can’t! I need uplifting people I need uplifting people in my life. People who want to be around me!

And these are just the ones that keep rewinding and playing in my head because they were said in such an unkind way. 

There were more.  Lots more!

There was not one thing that I said that was not counteracted to bring the focus back to the toxic person. Everything that came from her mouth was negative. EVERYTHING! I kept trying to find one positive thing that I could focus on, but never did. Not one!

I keep asking myself how can one person not realize they are this way. 

How can someone complain this much and truly believe they are in the right, and everyone else is at fault, and put to get them.

But then I kept being silently reminded that it’s not my job to fix anyone or prove anything. I’ve lived my whole life forgiving and forgetting, meanwhile parts of me were dwindling away.

It’s my job to take care of myself. And after suffering years from emotional abuse… I have finally reached my breaking point.

It felt liberating!

It was as if something snapped and I freaked out and yes, my flesh got the best of me for an all of five minutes, but then I just went numb. 

It scared me instantly, but I’m still not entirely sure if that was a normal feeling to have. Perhaps it was.

It’s finally over.  A weight had been lifted. I don’t feel dread and suffocation any more.

I don’t feel as if I need to fix it. In fact, there is nothing left to fix. 

And the best part is, I don’t even owe her an explanation. I have the liberty and freedom to step back from any thing that is tearing me down. 


I’m truly done.


When I was 16, I lived down in Florida with my grandmother for a season.
She was well in her sixties. 

I use to watch and examine her morning routine while living with her.
It first involved, waking at 6am to prepare her cup of Sanka coffee. And then sitting down for her morning devotions. Which was 30 minutes. Fifteen to read. Fifteen to pray.
Then she would turn on her 13″ black and white television and watch Phil Donahue. I think that was the name of the program. 
After that, whether she was going anywhere or not, she would shower, get dressed and apply a bit of makeup. 
Grandma wore Estee Lauder. 

Which I have yet to try. But I want too!
It was one of the few luxury items that she splurged on a couple times a year. 
Or sometimes, she received some from her employer as a Holiday gift. She had later shared with me.
She wore bright pink Estée Lauder lipstick. A pale Estée Lauder foundation. And bit of cream blush. That was it.
One morning while quietly watching her from the sofa, I asked her what the liquid stuff she was putting on her face was?
Oddly, I did not know a whole lot of make-up when I was a teenager. I thought I did. But nothing to what I know now.
In fact, I use to think eye shadow went underneath your eyes. Where concealer goes. 😳
At age sixteen, I wore face powder, eye shadow, eyeliner, mascara, and lipstick. 
Always the same look. 😐

Nude Covergirl face Powder. (The ever popular brown compact that Christie Brinkley made famous.)
Electric blue Maybellie mascara. (Pink tube)

Wet & Wild blue eyeliner. 

And a Maybelline blue and pink eye shadow compact. In the blue  Blooming Colors quad. I think that’s Carol Alt in the ad? 

Oh! And any coral lipstick that was available to me. Basically, stuff my mother or aunt didn’t need anymore. Stuff they passed down to me. 
So I was intrigued over this liquid porcelain stuff that my grandmother was putting all over her face with her hands. (No Beauty blenders or brushes back then.)
That morning I asked grandma what it was, exactly.

She laughed and told me that I didn’t have to worry about what it was, or how to use it…for many years.

And that was the end of that.
Back in those days you simply did not question an adult after they spoke. Especially one you respected. 
After she applied her foundation. (Which I saw in the bathroom later that day and picked it up to see what it was called.)
And no, it did not even accure to me to open it up and try it. Although I think nowadays I would have, and same goes for today’s teens. 

Let’s face it, we are all so curious. 

Years and years passed..
I have been through many a make-up trend. 

I’ve also spent several years not wearing any makeup at all.
However, Currently, I’m loving ALL makeup.

It upsets me that I did not have the options that today’s teens have.
From primers to setting sprays, to pore minimizing creams…
Options are endless!
So today while rummaging through my makeup, Grandma came into my mind. IN NEON!
I looked over my large foundation COLLECTION and I took a moment to remember that very day that I learned what foundation was, and how to apply it.

Grandma never shared how old she was when she first started wearing foundation, but I started wearing it in my mid-thirties.
I love a good BB cream also. As it’s a one step process to hide acne scars, red marks, sun spots, and hyperpigmintation issues.

I love what foundation can do too. 

It makes this girls aging face look like a blank canvas. Well sorta. 😉
As you know, when the face ages, it looses collagen and becomes quiet dry. It dies t matter how many gallons of water I drink.

I can’t wear full coverage, or matifying formulas. I need to stick to dewy, glowy, somewhat sheer finishes…leaving the rest for my daughters to play around with. Makeup should be fun! Nothing to take too serious. I do think too many people see it as a negative thing. But if you have the time to play around with it. It’s fun! Why not?! 😉
~I miss my grandmother so very much. ❤

As a teen, I look back and realize how I simply did not appreciate everything she did for me. Along with our ‘little moments’ that seemed silly at the time…they were memories in the making.

I try to have a lot of memories like these with my own kids, seeing as they do not have grandparents who are active and close by in their lives.
I love you grandma. Thank you for always being there for me and never giving up on me. 
~Until we meet again.. at the pearly gates of Heaven.

Am I going mental, or just getting older?

I hope it’s the latter.

I’ve always heard that when you turn forty, your world is shaken upside down and all around.
That you change. 

Sometimes having a nervous breakdown.

Men and women alike.

Men change careers, have affairs, buy fancy sports cars. Sometimes all of the above.

Ladies have emotional breakdowns,then their health goes down the tubes.

Sometimes remarrying and having more children.

Your appearance changes.
The way you dress, wear your hair, and your hobbies change.
Even your circle of friends may change.

Why? Because YOU change!
I have found what has changed for me, more then anything else has been my mental state. 

For the better too! I feel at ease.  Fearless!
In my 20’s I was all about myself.

In my 30’s I was an emotional basket case.
Not to name call, but I really was. Pregnancy does things to the brain. I swear it does!

I was SO emotional and worried about everything, and everyone.
Who I was, my future, and my children’s lives. Everything!

I was also trying to micromanage all areas of my life. All.the.time. It wasn’t fun.

And looking back nowadays, I’m embarrassed for myself….

Aw well. That’s part of life, I guess.
Now, in my 40’s, I am the best version of me.

Not to toot my own horn, but if the shoe fits. 😉

I have been noticing how laid back I’ve become.  Even my family has noticed. I just don’t worry about, well, anything.

And my OCD has chilled way the heck out.

I have also noticed these past few days, is that I’m not thinking about crap 24/7.
My head is not spinning or foggy anymore.

I wish I could explain it, so you all could share whether or not it has happened to you. Yet.(Providing you are of age) 😉


If today is Monday, and I have plans on Thursday to go out to dinner or the movies and a concert. Whatever the case may be…
I use to be thinking non-stop about “said event” until that day arrived.
Much like the anticipation that most people have for the Holidays.

But I have noticed lately that I am truly living each day as it is. Every day!
I’m living one day at a time. 

And I’m so much happier!

I have had a few events happen in my personal life these past few years that may, or may not, attributed to this new me. But I don’t see any of it as regrets, or a negative. Anymore! 😉
That said, I think age has played a huge role in my happiness.
So I’m here to tell you that everything gets better with age.

Like a fine wine. 🍷
Encouragement for today:

Each day, or perhaps week, is nothing more then a chapter in a book. Your book! 

Your life book! And like a book, some chapters are Better then others.

And most books are pretty good! 😉

You Are Good!

Life is Good!

And you are going to get through whatever chapter  you are participating in right now. 

There is no place to go but up! 🙌

Low Iron/Anemic

I’ve always considered myself moderately healthy.
At least for my age.

There are many women my age are on a full arsenal of drugs. Prozac, Paxil, Metformin, Hydrocodone, Zocor, Prinivil, Hydrochlorothiazide, Prevacid, and the alike.
At least all the woman I know personally.
I’ve always tried to treat symptoms with diet. Rather then meds.

Some things have been out of my controltjpugh, such as my hypo-thyroid issues and my ongoing low iron.

I’ve struggled with low iron since age fifteen.

I found out I was anemic, one day while I was out shopping with my mother at K-mart; of all places.

I fainted in the layaway department for no apparent reason, or so I thought.

Little did I know, I was anemic.
~IRON deficiencies~

I feel like everyone has them.
Especially when you have had more then a couple of children.

I’ve had a homeopathic Doctor tell me that low iron is hereditary. But it becomes more severe with each birth.

I have been making a large effort to become proactive. I started taking this industrial liquid iron tonic that has made a world of difference in my energy levels.

I ‘almost’ jump out of bed each morning.
No more zombie mornings!

There is one side effect though: Cystic Acne
It’s time to decide whether I want energy, while looking like some teen girl going through puberty.

Or, have a clear complexion and feel like a zombie, while reaching for coffee throughout the whole the day.

If you are struggling for daily energy, you must try this particular iron. I have tried many, but this one is top notch!




Doctors and Cell phones

I went to the doctors today. I had yearly blood work done. Everything is good except my anemia and lazy thyroid…which I already knew from last year.

 They tried to get me to have a mammogram too, until I asked them if they saw the latest reports on them..They no longer feel that 40 is the right age to start getting one, but 50..
And to top that, there has no solid proof that having them at all, has caught any life threatening cancers. Most that have been caught were treated as if they were. Come to find out they were benign. 
THAT is what the news said just last week!

Then they asked when was the last time I got a pap smear and all that fun stuff..Thankfully I did just take care of that for the first time in seven years. I did that just a couple weeks ago and all was A’OK!

Then they wanted to give me a tetanus shot..which I declined, but may change my mind next year if we end up going on a mission trip to Guatemala.

I also had low vitamin D. It wasn’t low when I was tanning, so I may start that up again..I have been felling rather white…:)

I saw a new doctor today. She was nice, but it was hard discussing my struggle with trying to lose more weight… She was trying to sympathize, mentioning  times she has went up above 100lbs…
And for her, that is a lot. She is very tiny.
SOmething bad that happened, was I am shorter! They checked twice and did mention it to me. The year before last, I was 5’10. Last year I was 5’9, and today i was 5’8! IDK, I thought that was very odd. They told me it was normal, and I probably will not get any shorter.

So that was the jist of my doctors appointments this past month. I still have one other one next Tuesday. *sigh*
I need to go have a internal ultrasound done to make sure all looks good.
Hopefully after next week I will be good to go till next year, or better yet, the year after..
I’ve really been trying to be diligent about keeping up with my health..now that I am getting older.


After my doctors appointment we went back to the office and while in the bathroom of all places..A lady came up behind me and gave me a great big hug!
A much needed hug, actually.
She is a coworker of DH’s, who I’ve not seen in ages. She is such a genuine, loving person..It was exactly what I needed to brighten up my day.

–And here it is, nearly midnight. I’ve only had 5 hours of sleep last night..yet I managed to spend the day at DH’s work, go grocery shopping. Stop at a new Goodwill. Then go to the gym and did a very good workout on the Elliptical.
 I feel very proud of myself today..
I thought I would be having FB withdrawals like I did last November, but I’m really not.
A couple FB friends have been texting me, but My daily texts have went from about 60, to 3!
Mainly because each time I post on a FB post, anyone who posts after me gets sent to my phone as 1/2 a text.
It doesn’t always come at the moment someone posts, but I do eventually get it.. 

I suppose that will change once my iphone comes in the mail. Dad called to tell me that they shipped it yesterday.
I’m still in shock that he went and just got me one.
I didn’t ask for it…In fact, if had been my choice, I would have chosen The Galaxy… DH is super happy though, because now certain Apps that he has on his phone can be intertwined with mine…
I am still not sure though, but trying remain optimistic. I know my dad just wants to make me happy, and I love him for that.

I have been watching youtube videos to teach me how to use it. I’m pretty old school..so we will see.

The one thing that I have excited myself about is the voice command. When I want to text someone, I just have to speak into the phone to text, then voice what I want the text to say. Same goes for email.
I think I am really going to like that feature.
I will also be using it for school.
My daughter asked me what a Bison looked like last week. So I hopped online to search for a picture for her to see..
If I had the phone, all I would have had to do was ask it what a Bison looks like, and in 5 seconds flat, it would have pulled up a picture and description of one for us to see.

Praise God for New Days!

I love the LORD, because he has heard my voice and my supplications.~Psalm 116:1
There is so much power in the word!

One thing that I am so thankful for is my ability to bounce back. I get crazy angry…but it never lasts for more then a few hours, or a day at the most.
I attribute this to my upbringing…
I was not raised in a Christian home, but the Lord has always turned it all around for my good.

I feel like I have the ability to bounce back very easily, I think…because of all the moving around I have done as a kid. There was simply no time to mourn, or feel sorry for myself. There was always a new apartment to explore, and a new school to be the awkward new kid at..

So today I woke up feeling very productive, given that I did not have the urge to log onto face-book for anything. I try to take three months out of the year off..Generally every 4th month. I took last November off, so now March will be another month.

I don’t like how much control it can have on me. I suppose it is like texting.

And because of my personality..I simply can not just ‘choose’ to leave my account active, yet not check it…
I know that sounds like I have some major self discipline problems..but then again, who doesn’t?

So I woke at 8am..generally it is 10am, seeing as I stay on FB from about 10-1ish each night..Give or take..

I woke at 8am, made breakfast, watched the news…had some really nasty freeze dried instant coffee..I have no idea what I was thinking. And I decided to work on my Birth Tree wall art, which is coming along very nicely.

Then I did school with the kids. Made a pot of rice and pintos…
Then I did some housework, and finished the laundry..

Then the phone rang…My dad called me, my cousin called me, and then a friend whom I have not heard from in a while, texted me.

It just really cheered me up!

I don;t know if it is because I don’t drive, so therefore don’t leave the house as much as the average SAHM..
But I need to have some outside communication..
I love talking,and I love listening to other people talk.

So here it is..3pm. Everything is all done.
DH should be walking in the door any moment.
The three youngest are out on the trampoline enjoying this awesome sunny day..Two oldest are getting ready for church already..

And I am continuing to pray for myself…Something I rarely do. I spend so much time praying fro others that I rarely remember to pray for myself..
So throughout the day I have been praying in detail, for myself….


Parfums & My History w/Them

I started wearing perfume in the 4th grade. Sure, I had those solid Avon Parfumes that came on a cord that you wore around your neck? But as far as real parfum, that came in the 4th grade. My mother presented me two bottles for Christmas, that I absolutely cherished. Both are discontinued now. *sigh* Such good memories….
The first one was called Electric Youth, By Debbie Gibson for Revlon. I just loved how fun the bottle was with the pink swirly thing in the middle.
The next was by Almay Cosmetics, called ‘ALMAY‘.
 I’m not sure why they discontinued the Almay one, as Almay cosmetics is still very popular right now. As for the Debbie Gibson one? She was the Britney Spears of my generation, long gone but not forgotten.When I was 16, I was down in Florida at Miami Beach, and a little girl ran up to me and asked me if I was Debbie Gibson?  I never forgot her face! ❤  I also never forgot the bleach blond hair and leopard string bikini that I was wearing that day! O-o
I  received a bottle of Loves Baby Soft that same year, in the 4th grade. Haven’t we all worn that scent, at one time or other. It smells like baby powder, hence its name.  I have bought my daughters bottles before, but they both hate it…They don’t want to smell like a baby they tell me. They also frown if I buy them deodorant in Powder Fresh!
Sooooo…Guess it ended with me..*sigh*
In the 5th grade I decided to try on some of my moms parfume one morning before I left for school.. She only wore CHARLIE, the original one. It’s by Revlon. I know they make the Charlie White and Charlie Red nowadays too. Mom wore the original Charlie though. Occasionally I will open up a bottle at CVS, just to smell it.
It may sound rather sad, but I have many memories of kissing my mom goodbye, and smelling Charlie on her every day. She would wear it to work every night, and it’s just something that has always stuck with me..Until of course she made the switch to ‘Ciara’..but Charlie always remained her signature scent.
One day while she was still sleeping and I was getting ready to walk off to school, I saw her bottle next to her make-up in the bathroom,and sprayed a whole bunch on me…Like 6 squirts! I was fine for a couple hours, and then while in class, I started to itch. I itched so badly, that it felt like red fire ants were all over me. I raised my hand and told the teacher that I had to use the bathroom, and when I got the bathroom, I looked at my neck and arms and I had all these little red dots all over the place. Apparently, I was having an allergic reaction to it. I went back to class and told the teacher what I thought had happened, and she said she was wondering who had on the strong smell! She sent me to the nurse and we waited for my mom to get there. Mom was not happy at all! Needless to say, that was the first, and last time, that I decided to ‘borrow’ moms perfume. I often wonder if I’m allergic to it still. I just don’t dare want to find out, as I have never forgotten that particular ITCH!!
In 6th grade I was given a huge yellow bottle of ‘Jean-Nate splash cologne’ for my Birthday. My mom shared it with me, and told me that she use to use it before she had my brother and I. She told me that if you place a couple cap-fuls in your bath water, it will stay on your skin until your next bath. I liked that idea, and started doing it right away…Then one day I went to school right after a morning bath in it. Before class, a boy was standing next to me at his locker, and asked me if I smelled that STENCH?  I was not 100% sure that he was referring to me, so I smiled,batted my false eyelashes, and cheerfully told him that all I SMELL was myself, and I smelled real good!!
He dipped in a bit, towards me, and took a random sniff…. then assured me that the stench was indeed, me! :o(
 I was more then mortified!
I stopped using it that day, and have not picked it up since. In fact, I don’t even know if they still make it. I think I will try to find it, for the fun of it.:o)
In the 7th grade I started collecting ‘Naturistics by COTY’. I managed to get all the scents.  They came in these tiny 2 inch frosted bottles. Each perfume was pastel in color and the color filled the frosted bottle. There was several in the set—pink(Paradise),yellow(Vanilla),green(Botanical),blue(Sea Splash),clear(White Musk) and lavender(Mountain Fresh).
They smelled very sweet, and each time I wore them to school the other kids and teacher thought I was eating candy, or chewing gum. My favorite one was the blue one called, ‘Sea Splash’ with the runner up being the pink one, Paradise.
In High School I fell in love with one of my friends mothers perfume, called Obsession, by Calvin Klein. I could not afford the $90 dollar price tag no matter how many houses I cleaned for cash….Sooo, I opted for the generic one called CONFESS. It smelled identical, but wore off in about an hour. I went through many bottles of it!
It became my signature scent for years. Obsession is still very popular, as all of Calvin Klein’s fragrances are. Very classic, and very $$ still.
After High school I was at someones house and on this pretty mirror in their bathroom, was the first time I laid my eyes on Chanel..There it was, sitting so perfectly on this white doily…Chanel #5. I picked it up and smelled it. It was a very mature fragrant scent.  I sprayed it one time on my wrist, and left the bathroom. When I came out, my friend told me that I smelled like his mother! Was that good? I don’t know. :o)
Later that same week, I picked up a issue of Cosmopolitan magazine and saw a vintage picture of Marilyn Monroe holding a bottle of, none the less…Chanel #5 Perfume. I lifted up the ‘try me’tab, and took a deep breath. Just like the week prior! $120 dollars a bottle!! Even more then the Obsession perfume. I started thinking..How can people justify spending so much for perfumes? *fainting*
After that, it seemed like that particular perfume(Chanel #5) kept popping up. I thought it was a sign that I must own a bottle…*G*
Later that year I went to spend the summer with my father and he took me to my grandmothers house, and sure enough, sitting on her dresser, was another bottle of Chanel #5. Weeks later, I went to the library and checked out a Biography of Marilyn Monroe after hearing from my grandmother, that my mom was named after Marilyn…
In the beginning of the book there was that very same picture of Marilyn holding a Chanel #5 bottle. It was her signature fragrance after doing many ads for the company, the story read..
A few years passed and I met a women that always smelled amazing! Very classy! She told me that she was wearing new fragrance by Calvin Klein called, Eternity. (I have owned 2 bottles of it myself, and it smells like a piece of heaven.A little goes a long way.) They also make an Eternity for men which smells like sage, basil, and rosewood. Very Earthy! I just smelled it for the first time a few weeks ago….Also very pricey, as all Calvin Klein’s fragrances are. The good thing is, you can by smaller bottles at affordable prices. Yay!
Other Vintage fragrances that I have owned as a teen were, Taboo By Dana, Navy By Coty,Wind Song (I Bought of Wind Song,  because my mom had told me that it was my fathers favorite, while they were dating and it made me miss my father less.. somehow when I wore it) Weird, I know!
I also had one bottle of ‘Vintage 4711 Echt Konisch’ (I think this was one of the first unisex fragrances.)
I fell in love with the bottle, and even more-so over its story…
*****In 1792 a Carthusian monk presented the newly-married Mulhens couple a seemingly modest wedding present. But this gift affected their future like no other; as it contained: The secret formula for an “aqua mirabilis”, later called “Eau de Cologne”.
Wilhelm Mulhens quickly recognized the value of this formula and started to build a small factory in the street “Glockengasse” in Cologne.
In 1794, during the period of French occupation in Cologne, the French commander ordered consecutive numbering for all houses. The Mulhens building on “Glockengasse”, where “Eau de Cologne” was produced, received the house number 4711. In 1875 this number became the registered trademark for the international brand 4711 ORIGINAL EAU DE COLOGNE.
A history, more than 200 years old, has built the image of this famous and successful brand 4711 ORIGINAL EAU DE COLOGNE******
 Such a Great Story!!!!
When I met my husband I was only wearing natural oil based fragrances. I had Jasmine and Strawberry. Both very sweet and I still love them both today. I’ve probably gone through about 6 of each.
My husband shared with me that he loved Elizabeth Taylors ‘White Diamonds’, That was the fragrance that his Ex-GF use to wear… I Have owned one bottle of it, and I thought it smelled ‘too mature’  if you catch my drift..
I did love the pretty bottle!
 He DH bought me the fragrance  ‘Narcisse CHLOE’ the day before our wedding. His mother use to wear it, and we also named our first born after this perfume. ❤
I was given ‘Tresor’ By Lancome from one of my sister in laws one year for Christmas. It was a very nice scent, but not me. The bottle was simply beautiful, as pictured….
Back home I was addicted to ‘Victoria Secrets Dream Angels-Heavenly’
I still wear it occasionally. That is, when my daughter doesn’t have it in her room. :o)
I also owned Victoria Secrets Rose perfume, which pretty much smells like rose water. I love the smell, but most men do not like the smell of flowers, including DH.
I also use to love Victoria Secrets So Sexy, until they stopped making it. You can buy it on Ebay, but it is discontinued, thus very expensive. They do still make the So Sexy Hair products which smell exactly like the parfum, so that is what I buy. Generally twice a year.
After my second daughter was born I started wearing Victoria Secrets Rapture parfume. It too, was a gift from a friend and came in the prettiest heart shape bottle that you ever set your eyes on. I always thought it was funny that you could not stand it up though. I just treated myself to a new bottle a few months ago with a gift card that I had won. It’s a very strong perfumy smell, and a little goes a long way. It lasts all day into the night. It was discontinued for years, and then they brought it back, but with a $50 dollar price tag! The cute story is, I had it on one morning, and my daughter, now 13, stopped and smelled me, and commented..OMG MOM! I remember that smell when I was little! She hadn’t smelled it since then, she said…*heartbeat*
Other fragrances that I have owned
Red Door by Elizabeth Arden. It’s a very sweet scent.

GIORGIO BEVERLY HILLS, which was VERY popular in the 80’s, and I was addicted to the smell. I don’t know why, because I have picked it up and smelled it recently, and I think it stinks.

On another occasion, I was at the mall and was sprayed by a parfum lady (do they still do that? I don’t think they do.)  She sprayed a parfum called ‘WINGS’ on me. It smelled amazing and I wanted it. $90 an ounce–Dream On! lol
I use to adore Avons GOLD and Avons IMARI.  I use to wear both, back when I was an Avon ‘door to door’ girl! I loved the bottles. The Imari bottle is even plastic and when it forst came out, I was thinking…This is cheap and won’t sell! But it ended up being the number one thing that I sold each week! Maybe the color maroon, which kinda makes you feel all warm inside? I’m not sure, but what ever it is, it is GREAT marketing!
 I’m big on packaging! Sure, it’s great if the product is magnificent as well, but more often then not, the things that I buy on a whim, are because of the packaging.
 It is a good thing that I am not a hoarder, otherwise my whole house would be filled with pretty packages. :o)
Last year I bought a bottle of 360 degrees. It was on sale for $40 dollars and it instantly gave me an Nostalgia moment when I was only nineteen. A good friend at the time would keep it in her car, and spray the car all the time with it.  I had no idea it was so expensive until I found it last year, and picked it up. It is By Perry Ellis.
Once again, the bottle is so pretty. I have about 1/2 left currently.
Oh, and the ever famous Vanilla Fields–another classic that we have all tried, I’m sure. Who doesn’t want to smell like a candle?  Of course we need to ask ourselves, do humming-birds actually like Vanilla? :o)
I tend to buy fragrances a lot because I associate them to people that have been a part of my life. Much like people do with music. I actually do that too..
My old pastors wife back home only word Cliniques Happy parfume. I never knew this until I moved down here, and I smelled it on someone at church, and asked her what she was wearing? I instantly reconized it, and then bought myself a bottle. It’s one of those fragrances that just everyone loves. I always get compliments on it when I wear it. It just makes you feel, Well, HApPY! Packaging is pretty basic and to the point, but they reel you in with the bright orange, as orange is a color that just revs you up and reminds you of the Summer, and just, once again..Makes you HApPY!

Currently I own a bunch of different parfum oils. Several Victoria Secret fragrances, The 360 degree one. Three by Paris Hilton.(Don’t laugh, her parfums smell Amazing!) Cliniques HAPPY. Bath & Body Works ‘Butterfly Flower’ (This smells exactly like the REAL butterfly flower plants, that you can grow in your garden to attract butterflies.) Bath & Body works Tuber-rose.(I don’t care for this one, but it was a gift.) I thought I would love it because the Tumber-rose bubble bath smells amazing. I don’t know what went wrong with the parfum.
Very Popular fragrances for ladies right now are:
Honey By MAC.  I am hoping to add this one next year, if I can get a good price, which would mean, UNDER $30!

Juicy Couture Viva’La Juicy–$45-The package alone would be worth the buy, as it would look very pretty on a night stand.

DKNY BE DELICIOUS-My daughter has been asking for this one.  I checked the mall last week, and its still $65!!

True Religions Hippie Chick– I haven’t smelled this one, but want too. LoVe the packaging, and I love the name. At $80 a bottle…
JUSTIN BIEBER’S SOMEDAY–  This is a Christmas HOT ONE this year. It sold out the first day it hit the malls, and is going for nearly $100 bucks on Ebay right now. I have never smelled it, but I am guessing the name says it all, as well as the packaging…


Taylor Swift WONDERSTRUCK –Another HOT ITEM this year for Christmas that has sold out.
American Eagle Aerie-$39 Pretty bottle and is said to small like Pomegranates,peach and musk.
Gucci’s GUILTY-Right up there with Chanel. $100—Made for the woman who shatters expectations, this fragrance imbues a feeling of power, a sense that she can attain whatever she wants—even the thrill of the forbidden.

Burberry Classic-$40–peach, apricot, sandalwood, cedar, amber and musk
As for mens frangrances, I plan on doing a men’s cologne post in the next few days…
The most sought after fragrance currently, for men is ‘LUCKY YOU’  By: Liz Claiborne. It made its debut in 2000, which makes it somewhat of a classic.
I don’t know what it smells like but I’m curious!  It is said to be a very masculine scent that possesses a youthful blend of fresh citrus. Sounds Good!
Second to Lucky You,  is Men’s Eternity, which has been on the charts since its debut in 1989. Very Classic, and not over powering as you might think, regarding Calvin Kleins other scents.
This is my history regarding fragrances.
Do you have a favorite Parfum that you’ve been wearing for years? A Scent that reminds you of someone special?
I’d love to hear about it. :o)